Half-wise, Half-foolish, Tragic End Of An Abusive Relationship

Tragic End Of An Abusive Relationship

If I were a figure of speech, I would be an irony. Just last week, I told my friend that she was worth the whole world and she shouldn’t accept any less from that pig of a man who kept treating her like trash and if she needed a standard to look up to, my man was there, just like Jesus Christ is the author and finisher of our faith.

I gave her so many instances of the sweetness present in my man. I only deleted some facts, some facts that might make the tongue sour while being told.

Example, the fact which states that I’m officially his side chick and everyone knows.

Another fact states that the white band on my wrist was given to me by him when he pulled me so hard and hit me after a kind of argument only true lovers experience.

You know, they’re minor facts so they were really easy to delete.

A few months ago, I attended my younger brother’s convocation, this brother of mine who held unto my words like gold, this brother of mine who looked at me with so much admiration that I wished he were my husband, this brother of mine whom I loved so much.

I knew I had to give him a valedictory speech even though someone had been paid to do so at the convocation. So I began to speak “Bobo, you’re done with the university. I’m so proud of you and I want you to know that the venture that pays off most is the one your heart leads you to.

“Do what you’re passionate about and forget about the financial benefits. With time, money and prestige will run after you.”

Immediately I said this, I began to cough intensely as though the advice I was dishing out was choking me and of course it was. I wasn’t in the least bit qualified to give that advice.

I’m Barrister at a very successful law firm. I have many victorious cases to my name and it would seem like I’m totally in love with what I do but in reality, each time I pick up a case file, I feel my heart drop like a big rock in a sea.

In reality, whenever I win a case, I feel just normal, no particular ecstasy, just the same way I felt when I picked up the case file; and how did I feel then? DEPRESSED. In reality, I want to be a teacher.

There was a time when my friend’s name was on every lip in her office. They thought she had scaled great heights because the boss was a friend to her panties.

She was so bitter about it and she needed her name cleared. I told her to be the boss she had always been and act like she was deaf because they would get tired and consequently, they would move to another gist since they were busybodies.

Recently, I found myself in her shoes and what did I do? I tried to convince most of the staff that I was clean; when I discovered that they didn’t believe my story, I went to the boss and reported it. He laughed so heartily and told me to ‘Come off it.’

I guess the lesson you can draw from my life is “Do what I say but DO NOT do what I do”.

I repeat, “DO NOT do what I do” because the consequences of what I do might be devastating, but the rewards of what I say are countless.

Yesterday, I was the speaker at a conference organized by my friend who seeks justice for abused women. I spoke on physical abuse. I discussed at length with the women, I said: “if any beast who calls himself a man lays his hands on you, report him to me and he’ll curse the day he did that to you.” I said it with so much authority and confidence, I knew I meant it and I knew I would end my relationship with that beast of a man I called a boyfriend.

I was determined to start applying my wise words to my own life. I drove from the venue of the conference to His house. I walked into the house and found him reading a book in his library.

I wondered how a person could be two things at a time. His personality was so mysterious and unpredictable and I guess that’s what had kept me with him all these years. I hate monotony.

As I stared at him, he stared back and I made up my mind that I couldn’t let this man go. I loved him too much and a few beatings here and there wouldn’t kill me, so as he stood up to wrap me in his embrace, I reciprocated, feeling his musical, rhythmic heartbeat.

He lifted me from the ground and put me on his lap. He asked about the details of the conference and I felt it would be nice to share; when I was done with my five-sentence speech, I noticed that he clenched his teeth so tight that lines appeared in his face, and he asked me in a solemn voice which I had come to know as dangerous, “Do you believe all that trash?”

I sighed and said, ” It’s not trash, and, yes I do believe it.”

He began to go on and on about how beating makes a woman submissive and he would never regret doing it because it was the best therapy for ‘all you women who think you are independent’.

I spoke back at him refuting his claims and the conversation soon became a heated argument. He kept telling me to ‘shut up’ but that only succeeded in fueling my anger. I paced round the room arguing as though my life depended upon it, even quoting sections of the constitution so he would come to the realization that he was scum.

I turned to face him and he walked toward me, I decided I would stand my ground, I looked into his eyes and said to him, ”This won’t take you far”.

Surprisingly, he hugged me and told me he was sorry for all he had put me through and that this would be the end of it.

Indeed it was the end of it because I felt something (which I guess was a knife) pierce my spine and I felt my own blood gush out.

He let me go and as I fell to the chair, I knew that the time for my play on this world’s stage had elapsed.

I sat there shaking like a lizard whose tail had been cut and I resolved that in my next life, I would heed unto every advice of mine.

By Favour Ene. Follow Her on facebook





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